210 blogs. 210 days of writing and posting and hoping you’ll read. What have you done everyday without fail for the last 210 days? I can say I have brushed my teeth and my hair. I have washed my face, but not necessarily showered all of those days. I have gone to sleep and woken up and eaten. I have (hopefully) hugged my kids and husband and told them that I love them. Other than that I’m not sure.
I don’t work everyday. I probably watch some TV everyday. I probably check my email and facebook everyday. I usually talk to my mom on the phone everyday, but we do miss some days here and there.
I think about Eric everyday. More than just during the time it takes me to write a blog and get it posted. I think about him a lot. Some days more than others, lately almost non-stop it seems. It’s all starting to feel unreal again. Impossible. Unbelievable. Unimaginable.
I worry everyday. About my kids, my husband, my parents, myself. About money and jobs and life.
I need to find ways to find joy every day. To make sure I appreciate what I have while I have it. Because it could all be gone in the blink of an eye.
That’s a good thing to think about this Thanksgiving week. Better than perseverating on loss. I’m going to work on that.
Just close your eyes and think of your brother. The pictures you will see will bring joy to your life today and all the days to come, no matter how many we get. Always remember, that the 32 years you had with Eric are WAY better than not to have had one day of knowing him. Be thankful this holiday for those 32 years.
ReplyDeleteGood for you!!
ReplyDelete