After I submitted yesterday’s blog post to my editor (otherwise known as my husband) he reminded me of something else from that house hunting trip. When my husband and I decided on a house to buy it almost didn’t happen because neither one of us had thought to bring a checkbook. It was our first house; we didn’t know we’d need one. Luckily Eric had his checkbook and enough in his checking account to cover our down payment until we could get home and pay him back. What a guy! I had forgotten all about that.
What else have I forgotten about? What other great (or not so great) memories have been lost to my subconscious?
I am constantly in awe of my children’s memories. They never seem to forget anything. Whether it’s a vague promise of someday, maybe, going out for ice cream or all the words to the Hidden Valley Ranch salad dressing commercial, they are little sponges. I think it’s because they don’t have as much to remember….yet. Their lives are (so far) shorter, their brains are fresher, whatever it is, it’s amazing.
It doesn’t help my guilt that I am already forgetting things about Eric though. Sometimes it seems worse when I sit down to write this blog. It seems like all the memories are running away or hiding. I need them to be here, to be present, but they are hard to reach. Then out of the blue one will come back and I’ll hurry up and write about it.
I guess this is one of the reasons community is such a wonderful thing. My husband was able to restore a memory I had forgotten. My parents and other people who knew Eric do the same. Hopefully I do it for them as well. To re-appropriate Hillary Clinton’s famous book, “It takes a Village”.
Right now my challenge is to make sure I don’t forget and to keep the memories alive for my kids. I still find it hard to talk about Eric to the kids, but I have to. If I don’t he will fade away even in their incredible minds and that would be unbearable.
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