#37 Support

The week before we actually got the call saying Eric was hurt, I got another call that made me think that might be the case. I was at work and I got a message to call Dr. T in Las Vegas. The only people I knew in Las Vegas were Eric and his girlfriend so immediately my mind went to them, imagining a car accident or something similar. I did think it was a little weird that the call would come to me and not my parents though, and I thought the doctor’s last name sounded familiar.

So I called him back. It turns out he’s a guy I knew from college. He had been on our alumni website, realized we were now both ophthalmologists, and called to re-connect. We had a really nice phone call. He hadn’t been in Las Vegas long, but was enjoying it, and he was also married with kids. I enjoyed catching up and we exchanged phone numbers and email addresses and promises to keep in better touch in the future.

The Sunday the actual call came I was busy striking a show I had performed in that had just closed. It was the first show I had been in since college and it was a great experience. My parents had seen it the night before and were on their way home. We did our Sunday matinee and then took down the set. As I was about to leave I got a call from my husband saying Eric was in the hospital, he was stable, but he had collapsed during a race and I needed to come home.

Needless to say I ran out of there. I managed to keep the tears at bay until I was two blocks from home. I told myself I was crying from the shock, it was not necessary to be that upset, after all Eric was stable. I pulled into the driveway and pulled my keys out of the ignition and my key ring broke. Keys flew everywhere. All I had left in my hand was my car key and that wasn’t going to get me into the house. I lost it. I sat there crying and cursing and frantically trying to find my keys. I can’t remember if I honked or if my husband came out of the house on his own and found me like that. He brought me inside and helped me calm down. He went to gather the keys while I called Katie, Eric’s girlfriend. Talking to Katie and Eric I was greatly reassured. I wanted to go out there that night, but my parents persuaded me to wait until the morning. It would have been tight to get a flight out that night anyway and I would have arrived at midnight.

I called Dr. T to see what he thought of the hospital. As an ophthalmologist I know I can’t often answer that question, but my parents wanted me to call and I thought it was worth a shot. Dr. T didn’t really know, but said it was new and was supposed to be good for trauma. He did offer to go over there and see Eric. That was really sweet, but unnecessary and I told him so.

We all know what happened next. The horrible phone calls this time came from a nurse and a neurosurgeon. Eric didn’t really make it through the night and by the time my parents and I arrived in Las Vegas, he was being kept alive by machines only.

Dr. T called me the next day to follow up as well. I felt badly laying all of that on him; after all it was the 3rd time we had talked in 11 years or so.

Before we left Las Vegas we had a memorial service for Eric at Katie’s church. It was extremely well attended. After the service there was a reception at the church. I turned around and there was Dr. T. It meant so much to me to see him there. I had several old friends drive and fly in from far away places and that also meant the world to me. Although I didn’t spend a long time talking to Dr. T, his presence helped.

Recently a friend of mine’s father died. He was ill for a long time and was in hospice care when he passed. The visitation was on a work-night, about half an hour from my home. I was tired and wanted to spend the time with my kids, but I remembered how much it meant to me to see my friends, old, new and in between at Eric’s service. I went, and I’m glad I did. It really does make a difference.